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Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Wrecking ball...

..I have been referring to this term a lot lately, and it's because I feel like my life is about to wrecked completely by God. And that's a good thing. I think it's already begun, with our struggles with infertility. Actually, I don't even like phrasing it like that. I know what we have been faced with, but deep down I don't believe we are infertile. I just feel like God has got some healing to do in other areas of our lives before the little miracle is to come. God has been revealing to me that His answer to what I've been asking for (a child) is "NO" right now. And I know that because He has completely revealed important things in my life that HAVE to change. The Lord has been pursuing me for a very long time, and I have struggled to get away in fear of what may happen if I am not in control of things in my life. I have been afraid of what He might actually do in my life. But He has woken me up to this and I have been convicted again and again every single day. There is no question about it - Jeremy and I have faced some pretty hard times lately, along with MANY people we are close to. But I'm seeing now that God is not giving up until WE give it up and surrender to Him. I am nervous about whatever is about to come, but I know that God is good. So I am ready. I know it's going to be hard, but it's got to happen!

Tomorrow I will be on the road with two amazing ladies, and we will be on our way to a conference in Atlanta held by Jesus Culture. I have great expectations for this trip! After all, I was reading about the upcoming conference the other day, and this is what I came across:

"JESUS CULTURE CONFERENCES are about raising-up and releasing a generation of revivalists. Our passion is to ignite a youth prayer movement and release healing revivalists into cities and campuses across the nation.

For three days, we will be seeking God, training and equipping, praying on campuses, and ministering in the city. God wants to see cities in America completely saved, and He is raising-up young people who are passionately in love with Him, know how to pray, and walk in the power of God."

After reading that, I sat there in complete shock for what we are about to go through. The two words - Revivalists and Healing - struck me deeply. When we signed up for this conference, (and I feel I can speak for all 3 of us here), I think it started out with more of just a love for Jesus Culture music and a fun trip. I'm not sure we quite grasped what we were getting ourselves into! But now it's clear, I believe. Here we are, 3 women that God literally brought together, all facing similar battles, in desperate need of God's love and mercy in our lives. In desperate need for change and a mess up of any complacency in our Christianity. In desperate need of healing and restoration in our hearts, our minds, relationships, and most of all in our faith in Jesus Christ.

So my prayer for this trip is that God will completely wreck our lives so that we will not return home the same people! I pray we come back changed women of God, ready to share with the world of His faithfulness and redeeming love! Please pray with us!

See you all in 4 days! I'll leave you with my favorite Jesus Culture song now:

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